Thanksgiving at my Father’s – conversations with my inner circle

I have so much to say so I’ll give this in punchy bullet form.

· It was an orchestrated event. M was there and my Father was running the show. For the most part it was very uncomfortable. When he and his wife tried to set me up with foolishness I would not answer and instead would stare and meditate.

I know that my mind is read, by all of them, so I taunted them. I sat there thinking “I know who I am, I know what you’re doing and I have grown VERY strong, your powers are not working on me. You cannot loosen my tongue. I am resisting you and you are failing to provoke me”. I said this over and over. And they tried harder and harder, but I sat, and I stared and was completely peaceful.

· At one point I manifested and it stood its ground and my Father was unable to deny it, and instead, He was prepared to listen. For some reason he said that I could not know the terror the people of Flight 93 felt crashing into the ground. I manifested and said “That is a lie, FOR I DO KNOW”. And he challenged me to explain how and I answered, “Why? So you can mock me and tell me that I am insane and deny me”. He said again “You don’t know what you are talking about” and I said “I will not falter on this. EJECT ME!”

And he became calm and said, ok, tell me what you know.

So I explained that for a period of time I had a series of dreams, but they felt real. Very real. I would wake up sitting next to someone, a passenger, male or female, it did not matter. And I held their hand. I sat there with them. I heard the screams, I felt the dips as the plane rose and dropped in altitude. I researched what happened and though I knew nothing of the inside, I knew the number of times it happened based on the dream, it matched up.

Sometimes I was at the window, other times in the aisle. At the window I would watch the ground getting closer and I understood that I would watch it so that they did not have to. I don’t know what this means.

I felt the final dive and it was like a terrible roller coaster, I felt it in my stomach and it was very fast. Too fast, it was uncomfortable, but I held onto their hands until the very end.

Now only an idiot could not translate this. Obviously, these scared people prayed and cried out to me, and I WAS THERE FOR THEM! I did my best in whatever state I am in and I wish I could do more for others. I have had similar events, I think, somehow, I reduce the pain, or take it for these people in this state. I have been executed by a Chinese/Asian soldier, I felt the bullets, many of them rip through my body. In the dream it hurt, but I was also lying on top of the intended recipient and I believe I helped them.

After I told my Father the story he said “How can this can be? How can you do this in these repeating dreams” and I was still manifesting, and I was to declare “It is because I AM the CHRIST” but he heard my mind and before I could say it he said “ARE YOU DEAD?” and somehow, forcing me to contemplate this stopped the manifestation and I said. “I don’t know, I CANNOT quantify where I am. I have contemplated that I am in the Afterlife, yes. It is as valid a theory as on a ship, or angels having taken over the areas in which I live. But I repeated, I do not know where I am. And he wouldn’t say anymore.”

· He repeated many times “I am Bhuddist by day and a Christian by night”. I think he was trying to explain that the Bhudda is one of his “Fatherly” carnations. I said many times, I have no problem with Bhuddists. I wish I was more like them in regard to meat and being able to move insects rather than kill them, but some scare me too much. I thanked him for being a Christian by night. When he said this, whilst taunting me, it turned dark so I said “But it is the night now”.

· At one point he told me of the 101^st airborne and how because of poor performance on D-Day and cowardice that they have to wear the Yellow badge and that they are still suffering the stigma 70 years on and are trying to make up for it. He said that the Military is very unforgiving in that regard. I said, to me it sounds like propaganda, you want your fodder, I mean, soldiers, to always run to their death.

· He had me talk about my UFO experience again, but I said, you mock me for this, you tell me it’s not real. But he insisted, so I did. Her kept on saying it is top secret military technology. And finally I broke, I said, fine, there is something I have not told others because it was always too out there. I said that the machine was able to speak to me telepathically, it spoke into my mind and I could hear it. Thinking this was too insane I never told anyone. Therefore, it cannot be human. This seemed to appease him somehow.

I also stated that when I had the experience I ran (peeled out in a car) screaming and that I have often wondered if I am coward for that and that it haunts me. I said, it is therefore strange that you mentioned the 101^st. Are you trying to tell me that you think I am a coward? He said no, in a battle, some people run away, some people run towards. He stated because of *omitted* he knows that he runs towards. I argued that my response was purely physical, I reacted from adrenaline and everything else and that soldiers are trained to control such things and I have had no training. I said, was it to happen again, I would stand my ground and talk to it.

· He put the TV on and it ended up being about UFOs. I knew every case study of whatever was on. He said that he thinks “Bigfoot” is possible and I said that I have watched “finding Bigfoot” on Animal Planet. He also said that he thinks people will find one. My internal joke is I wonder if they are Wookies.. I did not voice this to my Father.

· He constantly argued against life outside the earth, I constantly argued for.

· M laughed loudly at all of their jokes. It was faked, and strange.

· He was polite, pleasant and kind at my leaving.

I think that is all I have for now.

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Sounds like your dad has a really, really, really big issue with ego.

Is he really that scared?

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I wouldn’t even know what he’s scared of. I think it’s more testing, to see how I react when even my own Father treats me badly.

He did get me a fridge though, and I am very grateful for that.

But I really and truly don’t know. It is simply behavior I don’t understand.

Maybe he doesn’t like me. That is all a possibility. One that I can’t do anything about.

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This shit reminds me of the garden of eden…

I’m so mad blah blah you ate the fruit but here before I kick you out of paradise, have these animal skins so you don’t freeze to death.

"God is unknowable"

Probably because he makes no sense and acts like a bipolar 2yo , just saying.

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This is not exactly an ideal situation though is it?

When you’re a kid, a Son, you just want your Father to be a Father. It’s literally that simple. I also have a very gently nature, so it’s well.. It kind of means you wish a lot I suppose.

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I agree.

I think our failure, as a society and people, stems from shitty father figures.

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My message was changed. Impossible, I am not using my iPAD, I am on a PC with a keyboard.

I said "It kind of makes you SIGH a lot I suppose"